Limiting beliefs are the stories that we tell ourselves that keep us small or stuck in place. They tell us what is possible (or usually what is NOT possible), whether it be about our body, career, relationships, or finances. These thoughts and stories are so deeply embedded into our minds that we consider them facts. On my podcast, I talk about shedding some of my limiting beliefs,  just like shedding unwanted fat pounds. This is one way to gain strength in your mind so that your body can follow.  Rather than recycling what isn't working, look for ways to try again by doing something different... It takes a lot of strength to break out of those thought patterns, but I have been working hard to reshape my beliefs in several areas of my life. 

One of these is education. I was the first in my family to go to college. The friends that I had were a big influence on my thinking and expectations for myself. They often talked about 'where' we were going to college, not 'if' we were going to college. That helped normalize the idea of going on to higher education, and made me believe it was achievable. My friends never doubted they were good enough for college. I had similar grades and didn't feel "less than" them. So I started to wonder- why wouldn't I go to college? Once I made it into college, I helped pave the way for my nieces and nephews, directing them to fill out the forms, find scholarships, and look for other ways to improve their opportunities. It was satisfying for me to realize that my example made college feel attainable for other people in my family. I may have been the first, but I am not the only college graduate in my family today.  

Then it was fitness. Exercise wasn't part of my life growing up. When I decided I wanted to lose weight, I never dreamed I would one day win fitness competitions! As I learned how to take care of my body, I started to realize that the way my body looks is something I am in control of. It isn't always easy! But I came to believe that, with discipline, I could get the results I wanted. 

Currently,  I am learning to reshape my emotional landscape, starting with my relationship with my past. In some ways, this has been the most challenging because the results are not as obvious as the first two examples. I can't mark my success with a diploma or a trophy. It isn't an achievement that can be easily recognized by others. Also, I realized I will probably be working on this until I die because people are always changing, and relationships will always be challenging. I have had to learn how to be vulnerable and let down my guard, while at the same time, working out what my boundaries are and how to maintain them respectfully. No one taught me this, let alone modelled it, when I was growing up. I had to develop the capacity to self soothe, process emotions, and create healthy self-care practices. I needed to create safety and security for myself so I can then branch out and take risks, and now I know to take time for myself first and meet my needs so that I'm not expecting others to meet my needs before I can be happy. Sometimes our culture considers time alone as selfish, instead of a necessity to recharge.  It took time to heal that wound and provide that for myself.  I forgave myself for what I didn't know. In meeting my own needs, I can create instead and see new possibilities. How do I know when I am successful? I tune into my feelings, my self talk, my self esteem. But of course, I had to learn how to do all of that as well. 

I have learned to put my face mask on first, and teach my kids to do the same. I love my children and even the thought of them talking to themself the way I sometimes do is heart breaking. I have learned compassion through my experiences, and I have learned that there is nothing wrong with us. We are just humans. We get lost in our thoughts, habits, and programmed responses, and then we repeat cycles- even if they are destructive. All of that get passed on unconsciously. So instead of reacting to what is handed to you, create with me. What I have learned from food prepping I have transferred over to life prepping. Set up goals for 6 months from now, 1 year, 5 years, 10 years. Decide what you want your life to be like and how you want to feel. What are some steps you can take to get there? One way is understanding the tools will learn through our experiences can be passed on to my children. We can  create and  live a more purposeful life. We can make a sense of our past and take what works and leave what doesn't. Walk with me. Let's shape our lives the way we want them to be.

Serves: 4 to 6

Ingredients

• 6 tbsp red wine vinegar
• 2 tbsp olive oil
• 2 tbsp neutral-flavored oil
• 3/4 tsp ground black pepper
• 3/4 tsp dried oregano
• 3/4 tsp dried mint
• 1 cucumber – peeled, seeded and cut into 1-inch cubes
• 3 Roma tomatoes, cut into 1-inch cubes (I used cherry tomatoes)
• 8 ounces feta cheese, cut into 3/4-inch cubes. (I used 6 ounces) 
• 1/2 red onion, large dice
• 4 oz Kalamata olives, rinsed
• 1/4 cup fresh mint, roughly chopped

Directions
1. In a small bowl, mix together vinegar, oils, black pepper, oregano and dried mint.
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2. In a large bowl, combine cucumbers, tomatoes, feta, onions, olives and mint.

3. Toss gently with dressing. Serve immediately or store, covered, in the refrigerator.

If you are a woman in your 40s like me, you are either going through perimenopause or will be relatively soon. Perimenopause and menopause is arguably the most significant event in the aging process for women. You are considered to be in menopause after a year without having a period. Lower levels of estrogen affects body composition, including a decrease in bone density and muscle mass as well and an increase in fat mass. This puts menopausal women at greater risk for osteoporosis and other related conditions. While you will need to adapt to the changes that occur as you reach this life stage, the good news is, you can prepare for them.

Resistance training has been shown to effectively counteract the effects of perimenopause, increasing lean body mass, bone density, muscle mass, and strength. It also helps prevent falls and resulting injuries. If you already have a good baseline level of fitness and muscle composition, it will help you cope with the hormonal and physical changes, but it is never too late to start exercising- or to add resistance training to your routine. When you do the work, you reap the rewards,  no matter where you are on your fitness journey! 

If the physical benefits aren't enough, there is plenty of evidence that shows regular exercise improves your mood, confidence, and mental well-being.

There is no need to fear aging or perimenopause. If anything, it inspires me to keep going. Let me teach you how to do these exercises. They can always be adapted for to meet your ability or energy level. Just remember, this is a lifelong process, and doing something is better than nothing. Be gentle with yourself, set concrete and realistic goals, and celebrate when you show up. If you need more accountability, I am here for you! Join a semi-private class and let's do this together.

​Don't know where to start? This 2-minute video will give you some ideas. You are worth it!

Isenmann, Eduard, et al. “Resistance Training Alters Body Composition in Middle-Aged Women Depending on Menopause - a 20-Week Control Trial.” BMC Women’s Health, U.S. National Library of Medicine, 6 Oct. 2023, www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10559623/.